“Do I have the right to change my mind?” “Does a kiss mean ‘yes’?” “Can he or she hurt me without touching me?” Don't let questions linger. Ask for help. Learn to distinguish where a healthy sexual relationship stops and sexual abuse begins. Click to find answers to all the questions you've been hesitant to ask.

You are a teenager. It's normal to experience changes in your body, soul and mind. As you grow, you are displaying behaviors of a sexual nature and it is important to distinguish which ones are acceptable and which are not. This will allow you to grow and mature according to your age, the values and guidance you receive from your parents, your school and other significant institutions in your environment.

No one wants to criminalise healthy relationships and adolescent development. That is why it is essential to be aware of certain important things about both yourself and the other person. It is important to be able to speak up, if you feel that a sexual act or relationship in your life puts you in a state of weakness, trouble, illegality, or pain.

The other teenager must also want that. The psychological and physical development or maturity of the other teenager must be similar to yours. Your relationship cannot include any exploitation or coercion or violence or any form of abuse (e.g., verbal, emotional, physical).

You need to know the age of the person you want to have sexual relations with.

Sexual relations with someone who is more than three years older than you are considered a criminal offence. This means that sexual acts/relations between teenagers are allowed, as long as they are no more than three years apart in age and as long as these relations are not the result of abuse, violence, exploitation or coercion.

Sexual relations with children under 13 years of age are also considered a criminal offence. No one and under no circumstances can have sexual relations with a child under 13!

It is important to remember that the decision of two teenagers to have sex should be made of your own free will, without violence or coercion, pressure, threats or intimidation.

Even from others, even from male or female friends.
Moreover, if you have agreed to engage in a sexual act, but you change your mind at any point before, during or after the act, you have the right to stop and the other person must respect that.

If you change your mind, you must say so!
Even if you are afraid of being rejected or of disappointing the other person, you must gather all your courage and say that you have changed your mind.

You have the right to say NO and change your mind even at the last minute!
Even if you are afraid that you will make the other person feel that you don't want them, you must show courage and stop.

You have an obligation to accept it and stop if the other person changes their mind, even at the last minute. Even if you think they wanted it before.

If you have consented to some form of sexual act, this does not mean that you have consented to all other acts.

Για παράδειγμα αν συμφώνησες για φιλί, δε σημαίνει ότι συμφώνησες και για άλλη σεξουαλική πράξη. 

It is important to know that a person cannot consent when they are unconscious or not fully conscious (e.g. under the influence of alcohol or other substances), or if their physical and mental state does not allow them to understand sexual behavior (e.g. people with a mental disability).

If you are not sure or have doubts about the ability of the person you are with to truly consent, DO NOT proceed.

It is necessary for both persons to consent to a sexual act. Otherwise it will be sexual abuse, even between two teenagers. In this case, you may face the consequences of the law.

It is necessary for both persons to consent to a sexual act. Otherwise it will be sexual abuse, even between two teenagers. In this case, you may face the consequences of the law.

Child sexual abuse can take the form of physical contact, or even pressure on you to engage in sexual activities.

Other forms of sexual activity include: Touching your genitals or other private parts, forcing you to touch the genitals of another adult or minor, or forcing you to have sexual intercourse using objects or parts of your body or those of another adult or minor.

It may be done over the internet, where you are pressured to engage in sexual activities or encouraged to watch a sexual act. Pressure to be photographed or filmed naked can also be considered sexual abuse.  

It is therefore important to remember that apart from physical contact, there are also other examples of forms of sexual abuse that include exposing you to pornographic material (pictures, films, etc.), photographing you in sexual positions, encouraging you to watch sexual acts or producing pornographic material using photographs and/or videos.

Just like you, all teenagers probably use social media to communicate. In some cases, however, this can become the means by which you or a peer can be abused.

It is important to know that some online activities can be considered sexual abuse. What are these activities?

In chatrooms and social media, you often come across bullying behavior (threats, swearing) with sexual innuendo or content. Another example is when someone publishes your personal data (videos, photos, etc.) with sexual content or innuendo.

Also, if in a previous relationship you exchanged personal photos, the other person does not have the right under any circumstances and at any time (before, during, or after the end of your relationship) to circulate these photos and post them on social media! They are not entitled to show them, send them in a “private message” (e.g. via Facebook chat, Viber, Whatsapp, etc.) or post them. Of course, the same applies to you.

It is therefore important to be careful what you send and to whom. A private moment, either with another person or alone, can go viral in seconds. Furthermore, the third person who has that private moment saved on their phone may threaten you at some point in order to control you.

If you have photos or videos that a friend has shared with you, do not show them to others and do not send them to any other person by any means. This act may be considered as distribution of child pornography and you may face the consequences of the law.

The internet can also become a channel of communication between you and someone who wants to exploit or seduce you. This is known as “grooming”. Grooming refers to an adult person’s attempt to establish a trusting relationship with a child, with the primary aim of arranging to meet in order to engage in a sexual act or produce child pornography material.

They usually start conversations with children or teenagers like you in an attempt to develop a trusting relationship and get as much information as possible about where you live, your interests, hobbies and sexual experiences.

Sometimes, they use a fake identity, pretending to be children themselves in order to gain your trust, or they may keep their true identity and pretend to share similar interests with you.

Conversations can last for days, weeks, even months, until the perpetrator gains your trust. To achieve this goal, they will take a special interest in you, listen attentively to your problems, flatter you and even sometimes offer you “opportunities”, for example a modelling job. They may also promise you meetings with celebrities, offer you gifts or simply support you when you discuss issues in your relationships with others.

Unfortunately, they are doing all this with only one objective in mind. To meet with you in order to engage in a sexual act or obtain naked photos or videos of you, which they will most likely share with others.

Don't accept friend requests and don't chat online with people you don't know personally. Also, never accept to meet a person you only know online.

Many times, sexual abuse occurs between you, in other words between minors. The reasons why some children/teenagers sexually harm other children/teenagers are often varied, complex and most times not obvious. In some cases, these reasons are likely to be related to emotional factors. Also, some children/teenagers may have witnessed physical or emotional or sexual violence or may have been exposed to sexually explicit computer games or films or acts that are confusing to them.

Whatever the reasons, we should keep in mind that a minor who sexually abuses another minor needs the same support and guidance as the minor who is abused. It is important to remember that the sexual abuse of a minor by another minor or minors is not a game, a tease, or a joke! It is a serious incident and constitutes a criminal offense.

If you know children who are either abusing others or are being abused, you can talk to an adult that you trust. You can also click on “Ask for Help” on this website. You will be immediately connected, either by phone or chat, to professionals who can help you. You can also do this anonymously if you wish. You can also contact the Helpline 1466. The Hotline provides support and information, anonymously and free of charge.

The perpetrator

• It could be somebody your age from school.
• It could be an adult you know from the neighborhood, from school or your private lessons, the scouts, from sports centers, training areas or any other place where you socialize.
• It could be a member of your family (parent, parent's partner, siblings, cousins, grandparents, uncles, etc.).
• It could be an adult you don't know.
• It could be a group of young people who you might know, but who are not your friends.

The perpetrator may threaten, intimidate or manipulate you, spy on you, isolate you from your circle of friends and family, and even use their physical power on you. Keep in mind that the perpetrator is usually a person in your circle of trust. They may say that if you speak up, they will reveal a secret you have trusted them with or threaten your family.

The person who is abusing you may be a member of your family. Whatever the case, you should always remember that no matter who has abused you, it is not your fault and you should report it immediately to stop your abuse!

“Ask for help”. It's the only way to protect yourself!

The experience of sexual abuse, especially when you have been subjected to it by someone you trust, can cause physical and psychosomatic symptoms (e.g. sleep problems, eating disorders, etc.) and various feelings that may be difficult to manage: guilt, self-doubt, unexpected changes in your behavior and mood.

You may be worried that the sexual abuse was somehow the result of your own mistake or behavior, or that you caused it. But always remember that it is not your fault!

It is important to talk to an adult you trust: One of your parents, a teacher at school, the school counsellor, the school psychologist. You can also click on “Ask for Help” on this website or call the Helpline 1466. Don't carry such a heavy burden on your own.

The person to whom you will talk will listen to you and believe you. They will help you. But they also have a legal obligation to report the incident. If they don't listen, believe, or help you, don’t hesitate to report it to another adult. They also have a legal obligation to treat the issue in all discretion and their priority is to help you.

You can listen carefully to your friend. You can also support them as much as you can. But it is an adult professional's responsibility to manage any issues that are troubling them.

If what you hear is too difficult for you to handle, it is important to turn to an adult you trust, who can listen to you while remaining calm and help you both, in whatever way is needed, knowing that they will respect your secret and guide you.

As difficult as it may be, you should bear in mind that the only way for your friend to be protected and get help is to talk and ask for help. Don't force it, but try to reach out yourself, even anonymously, so that you can find out what you need to do. Also, don't make promises to handle it yourself or carry such a big secret alone.

Talk to an adult or click on “Ask for Help” on this website. You will be immediately connected, either by phone or chat, with professionals who can help you. You can also do this anonymously if you wish.

It is normal to feel emotionally overwhelmed.

• Click on “Ask for Help” on this website. You will be immediately connected, either by phone or chat, to professionals who can help you. You can also do this anonymously if you wish.
• Contact someone you trust, adult or minor, and ask for their help.
• Contact the Helpline 1466. The Helpline provides support and information, anonymously and free of charge. The person who answers your call will help you and try to keep you safe.
• If you want to file a complaint, call the Police at 1460 or contact the Police Headquarters at 22808442. You can also go to your nearest Police Station. Sexual abuse is a serious criminal offence and it is important to report it.

Don't worry about getting in trouble if you've been partying, or if you were “drunk” or “high”. The Police are first and foremost concerned about your safety.

• Go to the hospital. Talk to someone you trust, an adult or a friend and ask them to take you to the hospital. Don’t shower, eat or drink anything, don’t brush your teeth or use the toilet or change your clothes before you go. For specially trained doctors and police officers, this evidence is very important.

When you report the incident, the Police or the Social Welfare Services will arrange for you to go to the Children’s House. 

There, you will be welcomed by a team of people who work with cases of sexual abuse all the time. Psychologists, social workers, police officers and doctors will work together under the same roof to protect you and help you deal with what you have experienced.

It is a safe place and the people you will meet there aim to protect and support you. With their help and support, as well as your own strength and resilience, you can overcome what has happened and move on with your life.